Sakinah Abdul Aziz

Amidst the busy week, perhaps I had forgotten why is it that I love school. It's really sad that due to the academic workload thrown to us, we have transformed into some sort of humdrum existence along the lively corridors of school. We all have been there before. Every now and then. So why is it that I love school? If I were to look back to catch a glimpse of myself back in the primary school days, and then to the secondary school days, and then to junior college, and finally to where I am now, I see two things that remain to be in common as to be the reasons why I love school throughout the whole chunk of my academic life: 1) People 2) Joy of learning It's always been these two. I think I could go on and on if you really want me to explain why people, or rather, socializing with people, really makes school so fun and enjoyable to me. Simply put, I love socializing. If you ask me, it's really where I get my energy from. I see a friendly acquaintance or a friend or a profes...

There are days when you feel like crawling into a deep hole, to stay there and to never leave. And you just want to let the world spin without you and you'd be more than happy to be missing out on it. I think this phenomenon is worth investigating; the one-week, delayed PMS. If there is such a thing, really. I have been having half-written entries stuck in my postings. I also realised that my blogging style has been pretty cryptic most of the time (or I try to be as much as I could). And if you don't think that my entries have been cryptic in nature, then I've failed to be a cryptic blogger as I aspired to be when I first started this. So anyway, it's about time I should publish something and not let this be stuck, halfway-written like some others. So anyway, I had a pretty good but tiring start to the semester last week, and perhaps there were just so many things that I feel so damn tired right now. It's as if school never really ended, you forgot that it actually ...

Monsieur Waldo Wally shared this video with me a couple of days back. I thought it's good, and so true too. And I love the background song called 'Cambridge' by Kina Grannis towards the end of the video (: The elections are getting really interesting. I am getting sick of the central library (fer real). I have one more paper to go, which is next Thursday. Am not exactly super prepared for it, so gotta push myself for one last paper! Have a good Saturday y'all!

Funny things happen whenever I'm too engrossed in a conversation with someone. Like take last Friday for example in the school library, I happened to bump into this psych senior of mine so I asked her about how honours is like and stuffs like that. And all that while I was registering myself to book a computer. So I was yakking away and I could actually multi-task, but I FORGOT the computer I chose to sit at. How silly. Can you imagine after choosing the computer seat, I glanced at the seat number without internalizing it. How typical of me! Something just came across my mind. And perhaps it has to do with me being a girl and everything. Sometimes I really wonder why on earth do the amount of clothes in my wardrobe simply DIMINISHES at an alarming speed. Are there crocodiles down there? Oh gosh. And each time that happens I feel like I don't have clothes when that isn't true at all! Ah, I need to shop nonetheless! CNY sales FTW :D Oh happy Lunar New Year to my Chinese frien...

This is frustrating. I ranted out so well and all it takes was an accidental click and the whole entry's gone. I am beyond infuriated (obviously this doesn't show). But then again, I can always rant twice. As I was typing before, the things I have to do and have to complete by this week and next week have completely exceeded the existing resources I have now :( I have three ongoing projects to do and I have been multi-tasking like crazy. There's paediatric psych presentation slides to tidy up, french powerpoint slides and presentation script and MNO report and presentation, again. It's crazy. The worst feeling is knowing that there are people around you who are somehow depending on you (well we are all depending on each other in groupwork) and it's tearing me apart. But I am only human and I can only do things one at a time. And I hate to admit and to have reached this state but I completely abhor how the academic aspect of french is slowly killing off my intrinsic ...

You know, the bad thing about not having the time to blog is that, I keep relying on the "save drafts" option, which obviously haven't been good at producing entries for a month! Well for obvious reasons, it's either I lost the mood to continue where I left off, or that I couldn't bring myself to sort out my thoughts well. So I shall give a summary/accumulated/condensed version of what's been written on my "save drafts"; - How much I have to read my psych texts - How heavy my eyelids were while doing so - How fast time flies - Eid - Being known as the "polar bear" by the MNO tutor, sheesh - Sat for a French listening comprehension test without knowing it was on that day, double sheesh - Universal Studios - Best popcorn bought, everrr. Voila, saves lotsa words ain't it? So that while I'm here I can blog about more recent things. So finally, I am so over and done with the mid-terms. Of course the pending presentations are still not d...

So this morning, I totally felt defeated. I guess language acquisition is really hard. Really, really hard. I went back to reflect upon myself how in the world do I acquire English and Malay in such a progressively easy way. And I realise that the only way to acquire language so well is to speak it everyday. And by everyday, it means, every single moment, every single opportunity you take to communicate with someone else. To utilise it in our speech everyday, and to listen to others when they speak. Because otherwise, you can never get across what you really want to say, and you can never understand what others want to convey. Acquiring a third, forth, fifth (and so on) languages at a generally older age IS hard. I used to have this confidence that if you throw me in a French-speaking country, I think I would be able to hold conversations. Yes, that's true. Normal conversations at a rather average, slow-ish speed. But I don't want to feel limited when I communicate (I do admit ...

Modules this semester: - Social Psychology - Paediatric Psychology - Learning and Conditioning - French 5 - Management and Organisation So tomorrow, or rather, later, will be the start of a new semester. Daym, Year 3 sounds so old. I'm feeling pretty apprehensive because some of the psych modules above are rather heavy. I am uber scared for French because this time round it is mostly about French literature which is something new and foreign to me. And that apprehension is futher aggravated upon seeing that my lecturer could be the same one I had 3 semesters ago. Not that he's bad, just that he always has tendencies to call my name whenever I was off-guard or wasn't prepared for answers, like all the time. Do you know how silly that looks? Imagine question marks all over my face while trying my best to form sentences in my head. Ok but thankfully because of him, I bucked up a lot and that probably contributed to why I'm still pursuing this language. So yeah, this is a c...

Now I feel like doing just one thing and that's just it. So far I feel like I've been running around doing a million random things, like tuitioning, and then to autism centre for volunteer, and then interviewing dialysis patients. And then soon I will be helping khalilah with a one-day media corp thing and there's gonna be YOG training soon. I need to just do one thing, I'm feeling kind of bored just being here and there, and everywhere. KL for 3 days was awesome. Being high during the course of the trip was an understatement. Shopping there was a disappointment though, hopefully I'll be able to go there again in July and perhaps the sales would be better. But food wasn't a letdown at all. I wish the trip was longer though. Actually, I just feel like being in some faraway place to get a good feel of holiday mood because I don't feel much of a holiday just being in Singapore. Dream on. I also need to find some good deal of time to read. I hate it that everyti...

Hello world! I know that I've been gone for more than 3 weeks. I don't even have an entry on the last day of my exams but yeah! It's all over now and summer break's in! Even the exam results will be out in a week's time. To tell you the truth, I have no idea how exactly time flew for the past 3 weeks. But here's some: Nuurun has already been discharged and she's been doing good! I'm grateful that you made it through my dear. Strut with those nice shoes and your pretty shawl and we can go out again and enjoy the summer break! The usual, random socializing with people! Went to apply for volunteerism at IMH and Autism Partnership, we decided the latter and still waiting for confirmation if we can volunteer to work with the kids :) Was thinking that since I have free time, why not volunteer? But of course I need to get a job quick too. Had tuition marathons with tutee. 5 different tuition sessions but we're having one-week break for now. Hope he does wel...

I had my first paper today. I think that it was reasonably, moderately challenging but I think it's the sort of paper that didn't provide enough opportunities for me to display my true understanding of this module. Ah injustice, but I did my best! I still like Personality and I think Ryan Hong is such a funny, good lecturer haha. Hoping for the best still! :) Me and xiang decided to take some break and then meet again just now to study till midnight at macs. I was pretty appalled actually with the crowd at macs (again, I forgot it's a Saturday, I mean, exam on a Saturday?!) because there were hoards of people sitting, all facing in one direction, towards the big plasma TV, showcasing some soccer match. I wanted to find seats but to no avail and I was thinking, who on earth would spend their Saturday night at Macs? Then I realised that I was in a more pathetic situation (who on earth STUDIES on saturday night?). Ok on a positive note, 3 more papers to go, and then, liberalis...

Short updates: Final final French grammar test is tomorrow afternoon My FIRST final paper (personality) is in TEN days' time! SHIT. For some weird reason, I feel sleepy as early as 10:30 pm for these past two days. Crap. My crazy friends think that there ought to have tudung pyjamas for those who don them (this made me LMAO X 10000000000). Bittersweet experience for french oral exam, lol. I, amongst the sea of people who had, haven't watched How to Train a Dragon. Me, together with possibly two other people (katty and wenxiang) HAHA. So pathetic please. Is it really THAT good? Daym looks like I'd be missing a good show since gotta study (sucks!) I got the position NOC Assistant (French) for the Youth Olympics event! So eggciting! Ok so this means my August would be filled. But ... no news for internship yet. People reply at tortoise-like speed really. Even though I did receive prompt replies, those aren't acceptance letters. Jeez. If all else fail, I'll find a part-...

Friday night was super, had dinner with the just-turned-21 Nuurun, with amey, alvin, adit and jessie. Then just like what we always do, went to chill at Arab Street. The Iced Mint Tea served at the place we went was really refreshing. Played another crazy game of charades! Smashin' good time with awesome company as always :) I took a rather small break this long weekend, getting amused by all these Ris Low issues and whatnots, watched movies at home, and just reading. You should watch Diner De Cons because it is so hilarious! It's regarding a group of friends who bring idiots for dinner and treat them as objects of mockery until one fine night, the biggest idiot of all screwed the day of the protagonist throughout the course of one day! What faddy said about French movies are right, they comprise loads of talking, very few locations/scenes but the movie quality is good! I just watched La Chevre also, this movie is rather old (but not ancient), it's about how a klutz helped ...

Hoooooomagawd!! It took me about 15s to realise that I was soaping with shampoo just now. I was like wondering why on earth do I smell like Pantene?! Must have loads on my mind, geez. Actually it's because of this I begin to ponder the chemical fundamentals of shampoo and whether it can be used as a substitute for shower gels, hmm. If I were to stay in a rural, suburb many distance away from the city and I only have shampoo and the only shop which sells soap run out of stock, can I use it to soap myself? Actually how on earth do cavemen shower, or do they even shower?! Why am I even thinking about this?! As always I have other callings such as cognitive test creeping up (darn it, we only knew the test coverage yesterday and the test will be next wednesday, 1 week for almost the whole book?!). And tweaking of my finalised health psych report due tomorrow 6 pm. And also I will have to perfect my makcik-malay accent for tomorrow's presentation (if you're interested to know wha...

Stars - On Peak Hill. Interesting animation/vid. The weather's been pretty rainy, but that's awesome. Sets me in a very good mood. It's Sunday! Like a nice, soothing lullaby, the pouring continuous rain made me slept through the whole morning till noon. Well I guess it's been ages since I've found myself waking up anytime beyond noon. Went out with a bunch of french class people yesterday. Tried to finish up things by today but the weather's just too comfortable :) Finished reading my novel and I'm in love with yet another character. Before this I wrote stuffs on academic woes and such but I decided to delete those because I hate to have my blog to be heavily-filled with my academic life. Although my summer break seems to be uncertain in terms of activities and plans, I am really looking forward to it! There are some stuffs I'd really wanna do and feel so excited about, but what is it really? Like I said things are uncertain, I could be doing an internsh...

Hello world! Life has been nothing much but music and you know, this thing called school. I've been thinking about what people actually do when life gets boring and routine. It actually makes me wonder the lengths people go to attain excitement. It sucks to be trapped in this education system sometimes because you always carry this conscience that each time you have a little bit more fun you have things like term paper/presentations/readings like a freaking parasite at the back of your head (But I admit I don't follow my conscience more than 50% of the time exclusively pertaining to school). I believe that I'm not the only one who's suffering from this. It really sucks to be extroverted sometimes because my threshold for excitement stretches all the way up beyond the skies and I have to seek out external stimuli to attain that excitement level, which sucks the draining energy out of me. So here I am, staying in my little shell in the meantime. I've also been thinki...

I hear this old story before Where the people keep killing for the metaphors Don't leave much up to the imagination, So I, wanna give this imagery back But I know it just ain't so easy like that So, I turn the page and read the story again And again and again It sure seems the same, with a different name We're breaking and rebuilding And we're growing Always guessing Never knowing Shocking but we're nothing We're just moments We're clever but we're clueless We're just human Amusing but confusing We're trying but where is this all leading? Never know Never Know - Jack Johnson Jack Johnson's songs are brilliant! (Ok, baby picture has nothing to do with the lyrics). CUTE, no? I just had about 9-10 hours of sleep after popping a flu pill. Once again, nose flowing like a tap water. Guess I haven't had enough rest for the past week. Because I've been so used to sleeping 8 hours per day due to classes starting in the afternoon, I decided to ...

I love this Canon ad! Perhaps it's because of the song which I like. I love her second album Under My Skin (and yes I'm biased because my camera is Canon). I think Orchard Road seriously needs lighting. Have you seen it after they took down the Christmas lights? The whole street just look plain and dead. Maybe I was there pretty late and it was a weekday (plus Monday, first day of school). But I think it could do better with some lights, I really love the Christmas lights! Feels like some fairy tale setting but guess not, with the crowd and everything (= distorted fairytale). But at least we'll have our own Champs-Elysees in Orchard with the lightings though. Can you believe that I've never taken up the 11-storey escalators at Orchard Central before? And what's worse, I cannot believe I was a bit scared when we got higher, like sheesh! It was 11 pm, and I dragged aishah to do this with me while the roads were empty. But it was nice! We went all the way up till the g...