Sakinah Abdul Aziz

Of course nobody likes the flu bug. We groan and sigh because we just have that too many things to do that we cannot afford to fall sick. And then we blame the "bug", or the people whom we have come in contact with 24 hours prior to experiencing the first onset of flu (normally would be a terrible sore throat for me). But of course at the end of the day, we blame ourselves for failing to immunize ourselves against these viruses and bacteria floating around in the hot, humid Singapore air. To have come to this point, I am aghast at how we tend respond to falling sick. Sometime back, I was down with a mild fever (and probably a diarrhea that did not really manifest itself very well, thankfully) after my weekend trip in Bintan, and what I suspected, after savouring the delectable street food. On Monday, I went to see the doctor and I was given a 2-days MC as he was afraid I had dengue. But of course, I had too many things to do, I stubbornly went back to work on Tuesday, an...

Although there are some days when I feel like pulling my hair, or finding myself sounding super-duper firm that I scare myself and having a headache thereafter, and having to adjust back to being compassionate through advising and counselling, I feel so thankful to be able to meet different people from all sorts of backgrounds. They can add on to my pile of work, just by conveniently deciding to break the law again, or run away from Singapore. I have people who would make me laugh, just because the things they say are so innocently funny and how they make me smile, when they share with me what they had done with their families over the weekends, or what they have learnt from the programmes and courses. Or when I have to give a warning when the most ridiculous excuse thrown at me for not turning up for reporting was "I don't want you to work late ah Ma'am, I feel bad." and anyhow decided on my behalf. I enjoy learning from the streetwise people, and especially from m...

I receive cases in all forms of shapes and sizes. Some with sad and unfortunate circumstances, some have tragic endings, and some are just plain unlucky. And for this one? I am driven more so by bewilderment and amusement to find out why. Ok, so I need to remain professional.

There are different levels and different forms of unpredictability in different jobs. I suppose mine came in the outcomes of my recommendation, and the next thing I know, I had to be present in the open court to be cross-examined by the prosecution the day right after the holiday. Today is definitely a day to remember because it is my first big hurdle in this job and definitely my first time taking the stand to be cross-examined. And to be accountable for the very words I say before the honourable judge and the public as they will have an impact in someone's future. I am thankful to be able to learn so much in this job no matter how steep the learning curve may be now. And of course, the part I like best, is meeting my clients :)

So today, I received a rather interesting case which is highly likely to be challenging. Amongst all the cases I've got, this might be a tough one. But in this line of work, it only gets more exciting the tougher it is. I am so stoked on this upcoming social investigation :) Hoping that it will run smoothly. - Give us the eyes that see the best in people, A heart that forgives the worst, A mind that forgets the bad, And a soul that never loses faith. Ameen.

I've been waking up on Saturday mornings with soreness at random areas due to the Friday cardio sessions I signed up for with 18 other female colleagues during work lunchtime. It has been 3 sessions so far. It has been pretty intensive, particularly the first session. I had never shook so much. The one thing the instructor loves saying the most which has been constantly repeated is; "Squeeze your buttcheeks, ladies!". Be it whether we're working out our abs, or arms or thighs, somehow the butts are involved. We better have toned asses by the end of the year. Nyehehehehe.

I think the last time I felt so stressed was probably the final 2 weeks of school. Until today. It was a highly challenging day where due to unfortunate, unforeseen circumstances I was informed at the very, very, very, very, very last minute anyone can ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever imagine, to sit in for a very important appointment, which can possibly, well, affect my future, or the next couple of years at least. I do have the tendency to be dramatic, but trust me, anyone could go bonkers being in my shoes today. That, interrupting me while I was in a middle of a highly engaging motivational course on motivating others I was so paying attention for and some coffee-stained papers to add to the drama as a result of a delayed stress response. Praying for a good outcome anyhow. :D

Say hello to the girl who cuts apples with fangs. About more than a week ago, I was arrowed to bring something for breakfast before the meeting yesterday, halloween-themed. So a dear good friend of mine sent me this link for ideas. Really creative and cute right? Anyhow, I decided to make monster jaws out of apples after some persuasion by a couple of colleagues who were in charge of the breakfast. And mine turned out like this (photo credits to a colleague). LAWLS. I tried my best. Although this was a far cry from what I intended to make. Anyway, by lunchtime where there was a steamboat lunch in the office, I was officially known by everyone in the staff lounge as the 'girl who cuts apples with fangs'. So it turned out that I was the only one who brought something halloween-themed. Another colleague was supposed to bring a pumpkin cake but that didn't work out. There was even a joke that if anyone needs apples with fangs, "Sakinah would gladly do it at 5...

Don't we learn something new each day? Mostly I would learn about the job itself, but there are some parts of the day I would learn about the simplest things. Like learning how to pass through the massive security when I have to make a visit to the prisons for work. Even when it was the second visit there, I was still as blur sotong as ever and I had to give that embarrassed laugh to forgive me for my sheer bimbotic-ness. I lost count as to the number of times I had to scan my pass. I learnt that sealing envelopes 3 days in advanced is important to ensure that my mail is reached on time because they contain very important details of someone's life. I learnt that we have gazillions of passwords to everything, be it the share-point, or logging into the computer itself and many more, and you know that you need to write them all down when you realize that your memory is failing you. I learnt that I should be aware of certain times of the day when the taxi drivers are changing sh...

I was told by numerous colleagues to "enjoy this honeymoon period" and I decided that I should make the best out of the free time that I have now. The last time I stayed in the office just about 30 minutes more than my supposedly knock-off time, I was shoo-ed away by my colleagues. Fancy being kicked out somewhat because I have "lots of opportunities in the future to stay back". So since I'm under probation (if you know what my job is, you'd find this pretty pun-y and funny really), I find myself having lots of energy and so I thought of channeling this excess energy into constructive things rather than just bumming and sleeping all the time. And so I decided to run. I used to jog pretty regularly before I entered uni. I run whenever I feel stressed, I run whenever I feel sad, I run whenever I feel ok, I run whenever I feel triumphant, I run because it was part of my CCA, I run as an excuse to go outside and see the world in a flash, I run to clear my mind...

So for the sake of some quick updates, I've been having about a month of bumming. I had officially graduated after 4 years, which now felt very much like 4 months instead when I look back. It's amazing how time flies. I'll talk more about school as I intend to dedicate a blog entry for this particular milestone since school has been a significant part of my life and it deserves a proper closure in writing. I spent about 3 months doing an internship soon after and ever since it ended, I've been clinging to my 4 weeks of freedom very dearly before the start of my first official job. While I planned my last few days, the first realization I had was the very fact that I had almost no memory of the last time I could spend my days freely and doing whatever I wanted to. The last was probably the period of time after the A's, but most of it was spent doing a part-time job. This week has been refreshing. For one, I notice how beautiful the afternoons are. While the majorit...

I'm beginning to value my weekends more than ever. You see, when you jump straight from school and do an internship (which pays you just enough to cover your lunch) and experience the time constraints as a result, you really need to hold dear to your weekends. I love the weekends. It's about the only time you can catch up with your loved ones properly and give undivided attention. And most importantly, you can catch up with yourself. It doesn't really have to be anything remarkably adventurous or exciting. It could be a similar itinerary every week but what's important is you love and enjoy every moment spent with whoever you're spending your weekend with. It could be sitting in front of the tv watching Sheldon Cooper's pesky antics. It could be discovering how your sibling has similar music taste as you. It could be jogging around a nice park in attempts to burn some calories to get back in shape. It could be picking up a book that was put away and trying to...

"Destiny, I feel, is also a relationship - a play between divine grace and willful self-effort. Half of it you have no control over; half of it is absolutely in your hands, and your actions will show measurable consequence. Man is neither entirely a puppet of the gods, nor is he entirely the captain of his own destiny; he's a little of both. We gallop through our lives like circus performers balancing on two speeding side-by-side horse called "free will". And the question you have to ask every day is - which horse is which? Which horse do I need to stop worrying about because it's not under my control, and which do I need to steer with concentrated effort? There is so much about fate that I cannot control, but other things do fall under my jurisdiction. There are certain lottery tickets I can buy, thereby increasing my odds of finding contentment. I can decide how I spend my time, whom I interact with, whom I share my body and life and money and energy with. I ca...

My job involves keying in data, but what's more important are the details being keyed beneath this no-brainer job. In fact, it's saddening because I have to look through application papers for social assistance and financial help from mostly the broken families, or families with a deceased parent, or children with a parent serving his/her imprisonment, or abandoned kids born out of wedlock and whom their grandparents have to take reponsibilities for. It's even sadder to imagine these young children being exposed to such turmoil at the early stages of their lives. Anyway, before I get too attached to this, my newfound colleague just had me laughing throughout the whole afternoon so much that I had to suppress as much as I can from my usual laughing outbursts. After expressing how saddening some family situations are, she told me that she has seen even sadder cases as she worked in some social assistance centre before. And this was when the joke came in. She explained how she...

Now, I supposed most Singaporean bloggers will harp about the flood at Orchard Road. I shall skip that, although I'd like to add that I actually woke up this morning (11 am) feeling so good because the weather's nice. Little did I know for two hours there was a flood at Orchard Road and to think that such occurences are rarity. Ok I hope they would start doing something to the drainage system. Working at Media C. for 2 days was quite an experience, except that Aiman and I did nothing much on Sunday and we kind of did a million more things on Monday because we had ongoing tasks to do. Plus we've met exciting people and also, hmm, interesting people (of whom we secretly gave nicknames for us to refer to). I suddenly thought of The Devil Wears Prada and I actually wonder how the life of assistants are in this line of work, are they really treated like shit? Is that a part of climbing up the ladder in this career path? Ok random. The awesome thing is really to see how they swi...