Free time, or a lack of a better term, idleness (I'd prefer to call it 'positive boredom'), is an essential variable for creativity. Days like these where I have to put my foot down and tell myself to abandon work, are days where my books are beckoning me to turn their pages, ideas waiting to be engaged and penned down, films waiting to be watched, time seeking to be spent in quiet contemplation and the soul wanting to express itself in all its authenticity. Days like these are those which we tend to downplay on their importance and dismiss as unproductive without realising the magic they hold. Idleness is frowned upon because it doesn't seem quite compatible with today's norms of productivity. But idleness can be productive if this temporary emptiness of the mind and letting go of the motions invites modes of expressions and ideas that would not come alive if we were to be constantly engaged without pauses. In idleness, we are letting our extraordinary minds wander. And when we let our minds wander, we are letting ourselves grow and letting our souls just, be.
This is difficult to write, but it's definitely an important one amidst all the conversations we've been having lately. Growing up being brown/Malay wasn't easy, especially when it became ingrained in me that having a darker skin tone by default, is less desired than fairer skin tones. In childhood, I couldn't recall having to endure comments about my skin colour. Thankfully amongst children, these values ascribed to lightness and darkness didn't yet come to the fore. This consciousness became more obvious since secondary school. And it was tough and painful. I've been in a sports CCA since secondary school and I couldn't really avoid not becoming tanned. What hurts the most was even my peers at that time would make comments about my skin colour without even realising the damage caused from these words. These comments I recall, were sometimes made under the guise of humour. I was called 'budak hitam' (literally means 'black child') and even ...
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