Skip to main content

Pieces of you

I found myself walking towards the regional library after one tiring day at work. Not only just because I wanted to escape from the crowd and the noise, but rather, to be in a place where I could re-connect with myself, especially when my job requires me to connect a lot with others.

That was when I started evaluating the places I would go, the very few people I tend to gravitate towards, the things I enjoy doing, and the conversation topics I tend to make, whenever I feel I needed to unleash myself.

They actually reflect who we really are and provide insights into our true nature. And when we pay more attention to these things, we have found ourselves clues to our core self. Regardless of how we tend to appear in front of everyone else.

Because sometimes, at the end of the day, you just want to be you, at the fullest, all stripped and bare. No more layers of masks to peel. You want to be the real you, who you feel most alive. No more residual energy trapped within yourself to weigh you down. You feel free and at peace.

Not that you cannot be yourself when you're at work, or hanging out with some friends, or whatever it is, but sometimes certain situations, or the roles that you play, or the tasks that you undertake, or the company you are with, bring out only certain parts of you. While there are some parts of you which you are able to reveal, it is not completely you. Sometimes, even exposing the you that you are really not quite. Or being the you others expect of you.

And should you find a place, or a person, somewhere, where you can be you at your fullest, that is where you are home. Hold very dearly to them.

But should you find yourself nobody to be with or nowhere to go where you can truly be yourself, then be fully, fully, present with yourself.

There are times, when you need to be with yourself, more than anyone else, to being the real you.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Hitam Manis

This is difficult to write, but it's definitely an important one amidst all the conversations we've been having lately. Growing up being brown/Malay wasn't easy, especially when it became ingrained in me that having a darker skin tone by default, is less desired than fairer skin tones. In childhood, I couldn't recall having to endure comments about my skin colour. Thankfully amongst children, these values ascribed to lightness and darkness didn't yet come to the fore. This consciousness became more obvious since secondary school. And it was tough and painful.  I've been in a sports CCA since secondary school and I couldn't really avoid not becoming tanned. What hurts the most was even my peers at that time would make comments about my skin colour without even realising the damage caused from these words. These comments I recall, were sometimes made under the guise of humour. I was called 'budak hitam' (literally means 'black child') and even ...

Reclaiming my voice

It has been more than 2 years since I published anything on this blog. I have written a few reflections quite abit during this time, but they are mostly in draft versions, probably reflective of the scatteredness of my thought processes, or the ongoing engagement with the topic which has yet found a proper resolve (or is there ever a resolve really?), or just me finding mere words to articulate my thoughts that are waiting to be entertained and possibly verbalised or written. I'm driven to write this post precisely because I can't entirely ignore the nagging voice inside my head, telling me to use writing as a tool to not only express myself, but to reclaim my voice. It is such an insanely noisy world. The constant stream of information from different online platforms not only pull me from various directions, but it spreads my attention too thin that it is impossible to follow one stream of thought, sit on it for awhile, slowly reflect and if possible, articulate it. It is not ...

Cycles

I found myself stopping in my tracks as soon as I was greeted by a view. There I was. Struck with awe and captivated by the beauty of the full moon. And a large one this time. So full, so bright, so round. Though a moon in its very physical form is full and round, we embrace this moment when we finally bear witness to this true form. Don't we have to see some crescents, quarters and gibbouses before we see the full moon? What a beautiful reminder from nature that it takes a cycle to be able to witness this beauty. And that cycles and processes are important building founding blocks of life. Like the metamorphosis of the caterpillar and the developmental stages of a growing embryo in the womb. Every journey consists of changes and processes. And we trudge along to finally reach to the end point; a beautiful end product, a beautiful long awaited destination and a beautiful final abode. A journey may be interspersed with days which seemed bleak and dark. But there is light at the e...