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Extroverts

I am so inspired to write probably a short, brief entry on extroverts and our biases about them. It is just an observation that I thought would be worthy to write about, just because (and that I refuse to study right now). Also, I've always been intrigued about people's personality and how these portrayals of "self" can actually influence how others may treat you the way they do. And lastly, while extroversion has its positive connotations, there are some dark sides as well.

Based on the layman's definition of 'extrovert', it simply describes a person who is energized by being around other people. So what I think could potentially be a bad thing for extroverts is how people form erroneous impressions of them that might undermine the true substance that makes up the person himself. What I mean by this is how people can easily arrive to the conclusion that just because extroverts possess a relatively wider circle of friends, they do not strive for depths in personal relationships and they do not value individual interactions (one-to-one) as much as the rest do. Let me share this quote that will probably do a better job in putting across a similar message as what I'm attempting to argue here.

"Just because you’re beautiful doesn’t mean you don’t do ugly things. Just because you’re not pretty doesn’t mean you don’t have the beauty of a flower. Just because you’re loud doesn’t mean you hate silences. Just because you’re quiet doesn’t mean you have nothing to say. Just because people see you happy all the time doesn’t mean you never cry yourself to sleep. Just because you are unhappy doesn’t mean you can never be happy again. Just because you think it’ll never happen, it just might."


Fluffy or not, if you get my drift, the underlying message here is that; things are not as they seem to be if judged based on face value. I might be wrong in attempting to speak for all extroverts, but I believe there is some truth to it, and some extroverts out there indeed feel that what they really are, can easily be defined just based on their public display of interactions with people. I am not saying that little can be said about one's personality through interactions, but it is also wrong to wholly judge people just solely based on this.

So all of us form certain perceptions, right? And sometimes we judge, it's perfectly normal. I'll share mine. I used to think that this friend of mine has a rather happening life a one point in time. Contrary to what I think at that point in time, that was not true. So she proceeded on to explain to me how her friends actually thought that she's been going out a lot as well when she hadn't. So one clique assumed that she's been going out with the other clique, and another thought the same thing too, and so on so forth, when.. that was not true at all! I think some of us could relate to that, and it can be frustrating when your friends assume such things just because you have a wide circle of friends. So at the end of the day, if everyone adopts this mindset, what's gonna happen to the poor extroverted soul?

I think the main implication here is how in the long run, false impressions of extroverts can harm their friendships. For the lack of better example, people can easily use the excuse of "Oh you have your other friends what" in explaining their lack of effort or their absence. I know many extroverted people who value close intimate friendships, and despite having a wide circle of friends, they know how to prioritize the inner circles, and the closest people whom they cherish. Bottomline is, extroverts or introverts, we essentially need to acquire the important skill of prioritizing and balancing.

I would like to just have a personal say to conclude this. Every single friend deserves to be known on a personal level (if you allow yourself to, depending on where you want the friendship to be headed). Although our identities can be enhanced due to attachments to groups or cliques, I believe that you know someone best when it's one-to-one. And let's not forget our introverts too. Just because they enjoy being by themselves, it does not mean they won't enjoy your company!

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